Friday, January 13, 2012

Things I dare not talk about... and the other stuff.

(Big Wave to my husband if he's bookmarked this page)

So we are 2 weeks into the new year and I told myself I should post more positively, or maybe just include something positive in some of my blogs, or talk more about what I think of things happening outside of my head... or something like that. Hence this being the first time I have blogged since December. I just don't know if I can (or if I want to) do the nicey nicey blog thing! This has always been a place where I felt I could spill out everything from my brain, good and bad, to give myself head space without having to worry about the reaction of other people. Somewhere where few people who knew me would see what goes on in my brain but could be read by others who might like to comment. Since the whole mumsnet thing I feel like have lost at least one avenue for off-loading and since someone searched for my blog I do kind of feel like I can't spill on here either.

Anyway - here is a list of things I dare not talk about before I move onto the other stuff.

1. Continuing resentment towards people and evil up-to-no-gooder who sent links of my mumsnet posts to people.
2. Husband and new year's eve/day activities (Though I will update you on my London trip)
3. Holiday booked to spain to stay with husband's mum and anxieties I have RE safety and care of my son in a hot country with swimming pools.

So... NYD I took myself and the boy off to London on the train. We had it planned a week or more before and went to stay one night with a good friend who took us to the tate modern and out for food. The boylet loved the train and was so well behaved. It was a real education on how to entertain a baby on a 2+ hour journey. Something to remember for the trip to Spain in September, though he will be a totally different creature at 21 months. At least now I know he can be entertained. We had fun and the reason for getting away was to escape my husband's new year come-down. Definitely did the right thing, apparently he was so ill that he has decided to cancel his planned trip to see Orbital later in the year (yay) and instead we may go to the Zoo.

Before New Year we had the boy's 1st Birthday which was fun. He was showered with gifts of course and had a very long day on his birthday as we had people dropping in from 2pm until gone 6 when the drunkest of my husband's friends went home. I think perhaps it is an easier option to find a venue for these things; when you use your own home there will always be people who turn up later than they should, drink too much of the free wine and over-stay their welcome. At least in a venue you are confined by the hours you have paid for. Overall it was lovely though. His favourite present was the broom my sister bought him; he is obsessed with our adult sized broom. Have to say there were a few gasps from the less enlightened members of the family, in particular about the pink dustpan and brush that came with it. I wonder what they think of the kitchen I am making for him? I am definitely not subscribing to all this 'boy's toys' crap.

The Boy is now walking everywhere, even running at times. We bought him shoes which was funny as in the shop he resolutely refused to walk at all which prompted the assistant to say 'we do recommend they can do at least 20 independent steps before they have shoes'. Husband and I felt rather foolish, like parents who imagine their child's skill is better than it really is. The truth is that he loves to walk. Every time I drop him off at the nursery I give him some walking time. Before I was pregnant I dreamed of the day I could hold my son's hand and walk with him. Though he is still a reluctant hand-holder it is possible and he walks around saying 'ah ah ah ah ah' with such a look of glee. In 6 months time he will probably be moved down to the proper nursery bit, out of the baby room and back to being the youngest. Who could have even imagined it!

We have no words yet apart from what may have been a 'hello' and maybe a 'joob' which is what we call my breasts. I am still breastfeeding; so much for only doing it for a year. He still feeds at night, some nights more than others. During the day he is at Nursery or with my mum so I pump now rather than popping over to feed him. He has coped well with the transition which we started in the New year. He is still not eating very well, just nibbling and much prefers the boob. I was a bit worried about that because he is over a year now and they say 'food is fun until you are one' but I can see gradual progress so I try not to worry.

My sister is due on 18th January and I am so excited; it's going to be a girl. I really am hoping that she has an easy and uncomplicated birth. Lately I have heard that a few of my friends are pregnant again and it's made me feel it would be nice to have another. On the other hand I do love just having the boy, he is my little buddy and I am not sure how he or I would cope with a second. Had I the luxury of time I would try in a couple of years but I don't so I probably won't. I do feel jealous though. Our next 'plan' is to get a bigger house with more of a garden and hopefully nearer my mum. It is strange to be thinking about good schools and so on but there are better ones near my mum and it would make sense to move there instead of staying where we are. The plan is to change my mortgage to a buy to let and then get a joint mortgage for a new house. Then once we have paid off my house (when I am about 60!) the son can have it as his own which will be specially useful if he decides to go to university here. Hark at me, he's only just over 1 year old and I am making plans for him when he is 18!  We found a great house online (Which we won't get as we are in no position to now) which though rather ugly on the outside is great on the inside and has a HUGE garden, plus it's cheaper than I imagined so there is hope.

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