Sunday, December 26, 2010

Introducing my baby boy

I am a mum. Our baby boy was born at 1.21 am on 22nd December 2010. he weighed 6lb 15 oz and of course he is beautiful.  His name comes from various things. Dale and some of his friends have a habit of calling eachother by the name instead of by their real names, I had it as a nick-name at University because of my great love of Bob Dylan - so the name is kind of a tribute to both those things. We called him B when he was in the womb and knew that even if we put it as a middle name we would still call him B rather than.

At the moment I am at home and the baby is in the Neo Natal Unit. Basically he has needed some special care. He is barely five days old and he has had a CAT scan and a Lumbar Puncture. The short version is that after a labour which went from me having my waters broken at 6cm dilation and Meconium being found I was taken to theatre where I was given an epidural incase they felt a C-section was necessary. In the end I pushed him out myself despite not being able to feel a thing and they barely had to use the forceps. I got to see him for a matter of seconds before they took him away to take the meconium out of his airways and then took him off to the NeoNatal unit. D went to see him at 3am and they said he was fine. At 7 am they came to see me in recovery and told me he was doing fine. At 11am we found out he had had some fits. He had 3 fits in 3 hours and so the testing began. It's all ok now, nothing bad was found, but the first 2 days was a bit hellish. me on the maternity ward with no baby, D at home and B having all sorts of tests and drugs. He is still on antibiotics but we are really really hoping that he comes home on Friday.

I have found it really hard emotionally because when you have a baby you expect that you will bring him home. Instead I spent 3 nights on the maternity ward expressing milk and visiting him when I could but not being able to pick him up or feed him. Now he is in the nursery and I can feed and cuddle him but it is almost worse because I know what I am missing when I am at home without him. I am also very tired (Waking to express every 3-4 hours) and emotional.

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